I am not one to get inside of the celebrity gossip. I would not be caught dead buying a Star Magazine and I only buy the Cosmos for the sex tips (most of which are more hysterical than usable). However, lately celebrities have been pushing my buttons. I wish someone would let the rest of us citizens know what day the skies split, the sun shined down on the world, and everyone decided that if you have over 500,000 dollars in the bank you are allowed to and are in fact encouraged to break the law, cheat on your wife, drive drunk, and even harass a masseuse (Al Gore)? Because if that is the case, screw saving up for vacation, I have to save up to buy my get out of jail free card! Even better idea, I will become the first "get out of jail free card" broker for the celebrities. Give me a grand and ill make the rape allegations go away.. oh wait we already have those, they're called lawyers.
And for all of you celebrity junkies who will be up in arms that I am hating on your beloved shrines, there are a few things I have to say.
1. I fully understand that crime happens everywhere and if there are more people watching you, you are more likely to get caught. Don't do it in the first place and you wont get caught.
2. I understand that the "stress and pressure" of their "demanding lives" lead them down the wrong path. Get some therapy or take a bubble bath.
3. And I do understand that people can get bored with all of that money. Buy a puppy (but don't fight it).
But the thing I understand the most is that, if someone is looking up to you or watching you all the time *cough cough almost the entire NFL* you shouldn't rape a girl, get caught up in a drug scandal, or even drive with a suspended license. Did you know that in June alone there were 9 NFL related arrests or crime reports and in May there were 11? You may be the biggest and best tackle or receiver in the world. I don't care, don't break the law.
Whether it be Paris Hilton getting a DUI or Lindsey Lohan's mother attempting to steal an ice cream cake, it needs to stop! It is a shame that the morals of our alleged heroes are lower than probably some of the lowest paid, hard working people in America. And what is worse is that most of them believe they are entitled to get away with the bad things they do. I mean common Martha Stewart did you really think that you could hide the paperwork to your insider trading in a perfectly knitted pillow?
For all of us commoners, all we can do is sit back watch the hell that is called Hollywood and hope that the next time we get pulled over for speeding the cop mistakes us for Pamela Anderson or Brad Pitt.
